Bearded NPCs, or Where do all the thralls get razors?

I know I am late to the discussion. I’m not sure where the NPCs shave, I always assumed it was when I wasn’t watching and certainly not when they are at work. By the same token, I have noticed they don’t go to the bathroom either. I really hope they don’t hold it, that’s bad for their colonic health. But then again, they probably take their bathroom breaks when the boss isn’t in their part of the office. Same thing with their smoke breaks.

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I started shaving my head twice a year with a straight razor (no mirror) about 30 years ago when I began attending soutoushu za-zen (Buddhist sitting meditation) “retreats” every six months. It’s a kind of ritual thing in some orders of that Buddhist sect. It’s the monk thing. My brother was into it and got me into it too. He went full on lived at the temple as souryo (monk) and became a roushi (priest) after 7 years. I just go every 6 months for 3 weeks to find my center - as if a tape measure alone wouldn’t do the job. :stuck_out_tongue:

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Sounds like you have every reason to be confident in the obsidian option then :slight_smile: I can’t see it being meaningfully different - especially given claims that obsidian can take a better edge than surgical steel.

Like I say - no mirror I can handle, straight razor I know myself well enough to avoid :wink: (besides, I haven’t shaved my head in years - took far too long to grow my hair to this length)


OK, I couldn’t find the piece I wanted and the smaller ones were very likely flaked (shaped) 100’s of years ago so I don’t wanna modify them. So, I selected this piece for my test kit:

Using an ancient Japanese system of measure the Shaku, and specifically the Kujirajaku (whale bone shaku - used specifically for measuring cloth) as opposed to the “Kanejaku” (metal shaku - used for measuring hard substances), simply because all I have at hand is a Kujirajaku ruler. The piece measures about 6sun, 2bu.

  • This system of measure BTW, breaks down as:
    • 10 mo = 1 rin
      (a mo is about 38µm)
    • 10 rin = 1 bu
      (a rin is about 0.38mm)
    • 10 bu = 1 sun
      (a bu is about 3.8mm)
    • 10 sun = 1 shaku
      (a sun is about 3.8cm)
      (and a Kujirajaku is 37.878cm, or 14.9130 inches)
  • (pronounced: moe, lean, boo, soon, shock-oo, and koo-gee-law-jack-oo)

And you thought the imperial system was funky… :wink:

As you can see, I’ve chipped a few pieces off already and will be using those to test out what kind of edge I can put on this material. If that one larger chip you see there shapes well I’ll just use that melted into a toothbrush handle or something. The large piece has some pretty textures on it so I’ll at least try and avoid breaking the whole thing into pieces. It’s pretty substantial too at 1954 grams (4.308lbs or 0.308 stone for the boys across the pond).

I’ll keep this thread or at least @LostBrythunian updated on the progression as I go.


Please, keep the public posted, I think this is the best thing I’ve been a part of that isn’t NSFW in about a decade.


Yeah, if shaving is to occur anywhere below the shoulders the price is going up many orders of magnitude. :wink:


Depending on TeleTesselator’s blade control skills, the resulting video may still end up very much NSFW, although for different reasons than usually implied by the abbreviation.


There were about a half dozen jokes in varying degrees of (poor) taste and social (un) accountability I had to spend considerable effort to not respond with.

That aside, while I may not be a modern man, I try to be reasonable. If you chose to do that (and what you do with the footage thereof) is entirely your business. Not something I would solicit, but all the best to you if that’s in the cards. We all do what we must to earn a living.


In human history, the home razor was made cira 1903 by Gillette.
CE is in the stone age. Grab a sea shell.

With the addition of follower emotes, I would offer a compromise to giving thralls the option for beards…

A shave emote. Available as a basic emote for all thralls as they obviously know this behaviour by heart to the point that they can maintain smooth cheeks even in the worst of conditions that Siptah or the Exiled Lands can throw at them.


I may have found the in game solution as to what thralls are using, and it’s not razors or edged blades of any kind… it’s heated wax.

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Where can we get wax?
I’ve found ichor and oil, but no wax.
We use tallow candles evidently.

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Bee hives. Though the player can’t actually obtain the actual wax, just the honey.

But that gets us back to the lack of any in game item to explain the beardlessness. Bees should produce wax, but perhaps hyborian bees don’t.
Also, we should now have a howl in agony emote to cover how that works out…


Maybe the wax only generates when there’s nobody around. Thralls could have a whole black market beeswax operation going on :grin:

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I should probably give an update. I’ve been able to spend a few hours on it and I can achieve a very nice steak-knife edge using stones but not anything one could shave with (almost, but no cigar).


I need to dig out my flat-top next and see if I can refine it further.

Image off the internet - same machine though. And a younger man operating it… :slight_smile:

It’s looking like there’s a chance. The glass is extremely soft as glass goes - so edges and shaping is possible. Probably not much of a reference for most but it acts quite a lot like the Fluorite I was working with back when I was into telescope :telescope: making.


Maybe they just wax with rough wraps… its kind of like bandaids and those usually take a hair or two with them…

No NPC’s with beards?

Sorcery confirmed.


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