Nickname: Sorgenstern
Category: Eros (Could have been agápē, but… alas.)
A story told by Kaoru. References for the quotes used can be found in the spoiler box at the end of this post. Enjoy!
Did you know that we Phoenicians were the first to differentiate between draug and Deep Ones? Take their means of procreation, for instance. The Deep Ones infiltrate isolated coastal communities, creating hybrid offspring that are clearly not quite right to us outsiders. The draug, meanwhile, have a much more intricate method where they use drowned, reanimated corpses as carriers for their embryos. What do we learn from this? Whatever the outcome, lust borne out of the sea is a terrible thing.
pretty guardian of love and intelligence in a sailor suit! sailor mercury! douse yourself in water and repent!
The most persistent of all his hallucinations were the ones connected to the radio. I tried to take out the batteries, put it outside, hide it and lie about having thrown it out. Nothing helped. On and on he went about that piercing voice reminding him of his dead friends, his useless convictions, his delusions of grandeur. Tried to talk back to it, tried to shut it out, tried to hurt himself in more and more imaginative ways in order to make it stop. In the end, the voice always did go away. We just didn’t know how long the respite would last.
lost in time, like tears in rain
We were speeding past that once-overcrowded tenement, him revving up the Steed and me taking careful aim with the infused baseball bat. With these haywire robots, it was all about hitting that glitch in the armour.
“Wouldn’t this be easier if I’d just brought a sword?” I yelled, trying to make myself heard above the roar of the engine.
“Easier just isn’t our game, Kaoru-chan” he replied, true to form. “The game of baseball is as holy as the leather jacket. If your heart is pure, this sanctified branch will strike true.”
The robot never felt it coming. The bat went right through its neck joint, severing its head clean off and causing the body to collapse and explode from the accumulated anima.
“And it’s ANOTHER home run for the Ginpachi Buzzers! What a FENOMENAL streak! Can NOTHING stop Kaoru-senshu?!” Our home was being invaded by at least three kinds of supernatural terrors, and this guy was having the time of his life. And for a moment, I let myself be swept along.
came like dew / disappears like dew
The problem is, this kind of love story doesn’t really conform to your idea of classifiable, cozy space-time.
i wear the key at all times
of course i check on him who do you think i am got my best people to check on him daily or good as keeping tabs like it’s nobody’s business even got him out of trouble when those kyonshi came knocking as if i wouldn’t do everything in my power except yeah he’s better off now anyway so something’s got to be working been slaying it with all these bees as crazy as he is he’s got all he could ask for yes all of it what else could there be of course i know what he gets himself into who the F do you think i am
let’s don’t let a good thing die
Very well. Since you’ve been kind enough to share all this Lengstereisen with me, I’ll play ball. In this state I’ll need your help cleaning out the rooms of this place. You’d be surprised at how many uninvited guests I get. And in return I shall tell you about me and Ricky.
come rain, come tsunami, come the falling sky
Lying on our backs next to that huge tree in Ginpachi Park, watching the fireflies.
“If you could live your life again, would you still be… you know?” For some reason, he was suddenly unsure of how to phrase it.
“Well… would you?”
“Don’t rightly know what you mean there.” I guess he would never know. To him, he was just Ricky Pagan. Always had been, always would be.
the whole rhythm section was a purple gang
I started getting texts from Sailors, wanting to discuss some concerns. Unsuitable company. Could jeopardize the operation. As if there was any operation left. As if they had any leverage over me. As if I’d ever do anything to hurt him. As if.
to build the perfect being, we need the perfect building blocks
The first time we met. It was a hundred years ago. It was yesterday. In Ginpachi, of course. He put on the cheesiest love song you could imagine on that boombox, pulled off some dance moves to match. I thought that it came down to his generation… but then I realized he was my age. It must have been something about that place that put me in the mood for a steel comb fairytale.
it is not an idea that i miss, it is a man
One by one, the Pagans started dropping off. Got stupid. Wanted to play heroes. Got hit by bad luck. In the end he was the last one standing, the lone wanderer. That’s what broke him, I guess, got him to finally let the blackworm ■■■■ in. Or was it the buzzing? I was too busy to notice.
little things i should have said and done
Fighting Oni is a game of predictions. They wormhole-jump in and out of reality, weave this way and that with a finesse that belies their hulking forms. You learn to adapt. Calculate where their next strike will land. Identify a pattern to the madness, the geometry of Jigoku. Ricky had a knack for it, must have come from all the dancing.
“You gotta move with the groove, Kaoru! Slip, slide, slash!” That day he fought with twin wakizashi for some reason. I’ve no idea where he got them. In those moments, I just relished being with this man to whom everything came naturally. Everything meaningful, that is. Living, loving, lacerating.
i can still see the high water mark
Business or pleasure? I see. We don’t get much of that nowadays. How can I be of assistance? Why of course, your confidentiality is paramount. We serve Blue, Red, Green, White… oh, you needn’t have told me. Lovely combination, though. The Roswell room? A fine choice indeed. Right this way.
the beginning of a mass extinction, and all you can talk about is money and fairy tales of eternal economic growth
Within minutes of the Bomb hitting the whole gang were in touch with him, knowing what to do. Saving whoever they could, kicking Filthy butt and taking names. Those early days they seemed like invincible warrior-monks of Gaia. The Dream Palace became an impromptu refugee camp and medical center, thankful civilians resting their weary bones beneath latex sheets. Somehow, nothing and everything made sense all at once.
i’ll take illusions over lies
Yes, I did have a run-in with the Fear Nothing Foundation. Went there on a dare and stuck around for a while. The instructors claimed I had all this untapped potential, all this true self hidden away just around the corner. One of them pretended to nearly faint when touching my temples in one of those inane circle sessions. All the other kids were gasping like it was a WBC game. I could have played along so easily, but… I just didn’t feel like it that day. Afterwards they had a change of plans. Started looking worriedly at me and whispering about eldritch influence and danger of contamination. Bringing out the bad cop stuff. I decided I’d had my fun and didn’t look back. Best decision since I left home.
this revelation of the secrets of nature, long mercifully withheld from man, should arouse the most solemn reflections in the mind and conscience of every human being capable of comprehension
Hey there sweetcheeks, this is Kao-chan just checking in
To the Most Honourable Pagan, May the Guardians keep you. I trust this missive finds you well
Let’s cut to the chase. I know I’ve been an idiot, I know I didn’t end things the way either of us wanted, I know I didn’t
What’s the buzz tell me what’s a-happening
like having fallen into the sky
At Susano-o’s, the morning after a sleepless night. He had been worse off than I’d seen him in a long time. Couldn’t make him come with me. Gozen didn’t want to take my money, but I insisted. She made sure to slip in some extra tamagoyaki when she thought I wasn’t looking. Then she told me, once more, about that time when she and the dashing Sonnac went for one of their walks in Yoyogi park and she noticed something special about one of the rokabiri dancers. How that must have been Ricky. How even now he was still so deeply precious and how I would be such a lucky young lady after all this was over.
“Is that what you tell yourself about Dick?” I quipped, the fatigue and turmoil taking precedence over decency, common sense and self-preservation. She sighed and gave me a wan smile before answering.
“It’s what we must all tell ourselves. Or else we might just as well join the Morninglight.”
old Japan had passed by and disappeared, and we could only hear now and again the distant wail of the reed pipes
We found one of the Orochi alive, for once, just barely. Oni talon buried deep in his chest, not even the sacred mojo could save him. Ricky didn’t try to make him spill any corporate secrets. As if he had been doing this for ages, he splashed water on the agent’s lips and sat with him until he was sure his breath was all spent. He whispered a great deal, some kind of last rites, but all I could make out was “you go now to join the ghost riders in the sky, Kemosabe”.
situation has developed not necessarily to Japan’s advantage
So you know it’s over. I’m sure he told you it wasn’t about ‘bits’. That it was nothing so crass, all about that purple mark of mine. In actuality things were slightly more complicated. It was about bits, the bits and pieces of a man once called Ryuichi Sagawa.
it’s the end, final curtain call, lighters held high, defying the dark. no past. no future.
When exorcising ghosts, great care must be taken not to alert them to your intentions. The rituals are rigorous; non-stop chanting and burning incense while trying to sense the motives of the spectre in question. You can see how this could be a problem with someone of his… disposition. Time is a great teacher. I used to think we had all the time in the world.
and now! a tale well-calculated to keep you in… suspense!!!
He lives in his own dream palace now. Got his own key to his own private suite. No vacancies for at least a few months. High season like you wouldn’t believe.
what happen ?
somebody set up us the bomb.
we get signal.
Some days, he remembers the names of all the other Pagans and the order in which they fell. Some days, he remembers the way to the nearest pharmacist. Some days, he remembers the soft feeling of steam against his skin in the bathhouse, long before the demons came. Some days, he remembers to pay his phone bill, pick up his take-away, and put his bike keys somewhere safe. Some days, he remembers all the lyrics to Hoshi Wa Nandemo Shiteru. Some days, he remembers that he is mortal. Every moment of every day, he remembers two things: me and the struggle. I suppose I should count myself lucky.
[spoiler]
Everyone’s bits are beautiful.
/SWL: Ricky Pagan, intro to Through the Wake Darkly (followed by “All love is groovy. Every part of Kaoru was a delight.”)
Pretty Guardian of Love and Intelligence in a Sailor Suit! Sailor Mercury! Douse yourself in water and repent!
/Sailor Mercury’s introduction, Sailor Moon Crystal
lost in time, like tears in rain
/Roy Batty, Blade Runner (1982)
came like dew / disappears like dew
/From the death poem of daimyo Toyotomi Hideyoshi (1598). The full poem reads:
My life
came like dew
disappears like dew.
All of Naniwa
is dream after dream.
(Haven’t been able to find the translator, might be Mary Elizabeth Berry)
I wear the key at all times
/SWL: Kaoru, The Dream Palace #3
let’s don’t let a good thing die
/Elvis Presley, Suspicious Minds (1969), written by Mark James
come rain, come tsunami, come the falling sky
/SWL: Kaoru, Yourself #1
the whole rhythm section was a purple gang
/Elvis Presley, Jailhouse Rock (1957), written by Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller
to build the perfect being, we need the perfect building blocks
/TSW: Dr. Anton Aldini during Just a Flesh Wound (for the OG bees out there)
it is not an idea that I miss, it is a man
/Evey Hammond, V for Vendetta (2006)
little things I should have said and done
/Elvis Presley, You Were Always on My Mind (1972), written by Wayne Carson, Mark James and Johnny Christopher)
I can still see the high water mark
/SWL: Ricky Pagan, intro to The Pagans (may be paraphrasing a line from Hunter S. Thompson’s “Wave Speech” from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, 1971)
the beginning of a mass extinction, and all you can talk about is money and fairy tales of eternal economic growth
/Greta Thunberg, speech At The U.N. Climate Action Summit (2019)
I’ll take illusions over lies
/SWL: Ricky Pagan, intro to The Pagans
this revelation of the secrets of nature, long mercifully withheld from man, should arouse the most solemn reflections in the mind and conscience of every human being capable of comprehension
/Winston Churchill, statement drafted by following the use of an atomic bomb on Hiroshima (1945)
What’s the buzz tell me what’s a-happening
/What’s the Buzz? from Jesus Christ Superstar (1970), written by Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice
like having fallen into the sky
/SWL: Kaoru, Tokyo #1
old Japan had passed by and disappeared, and we could only hear now and again the distant wail of the reed pipes
/The New York Times, “The Funeral Ceremonies of Meiji Tenno”, October 13th 1912
situation has developed not necessarily to Japan’s advantage
/Emperor Hirohito, Imperial Rescript of Surrender (1945), translated by Tadaichi Hirakawa
it’s the end, final curtain call, lighters held high, defying the dark. no past. no future.
/SWL: Ricky Pagan, intro to Through the Wake Darkly
and now! a tale well-calculated to keep you in… suspense!!!
/Opening to CBS radio drama Suspense (1940-1962), featured in SWL’s Halloween event The Broadcast
what happen ?
somebody set up us the bomb.
we get signal.
/Captain, Mechanic and Operator, intro to Zero Wing (1992) [/spoiler]