Hello there, there are many good pve modded servers out there. If you don’t mind mature content, try Chains of Hyboria, Dark Debauchery, or Cursed Sands, pretty good rp players and fun community overall in all of them. Also, good admins, as long as you abide to a few building rules and such. Age of Calamitous has a server on its own you should also try (name is Age of Calamitous I think too). Welcome to the wonderful world of private modded servers, a totally different experience from officials.
You may see some are pvp servers, but as a norm, pvp is roleplayed first, not kill on sight (that usually gets you a warning or a ban, it’s bad ettiquete), so don’t let that draw you back.
One thing only, right now there are plenty of issues with mods since the latest hotfix, so you will encounter problems with placeables and other things, that Funcom (with release of devkit) and modders are trying to solve as soon as they can. I advise some patience over the weekend until all gets sorted and settled.