I’m on the same server you’re on and saw your complaints in global.
PVP can be really brutal. I am not sure where you are built but my guess is that it isn’t as fortified as you thought it was. Even so, having a “meta” spot requires a lot of work in defence, non-meta spots even more work is required and almost to a point of being a chore instead of fun. I checked each meta spot and correct me if I am wrong but I don’t think you were built in one?
Some key things: time, resources and a team.
Additionally, it helps to have game sense, skill and wisdom.
You will never, ever, have the reliance of a well built base as the only defence. The game is meant to allow raiders to get in easily if there is no resistance.
Watch logs while you’re out and about. Be willing to pull bracelet to respawn at your bed and have kits, respec pots and buffs ready in a load out area. Respond quickly, determine where they are blowing in from and go out as a team to kill them, take their shit and look for their FOB and bedrolls. Destroy them.
Having a team that is willing to get on and mount both defence and offence is very important, doing it alone or less than 5 can be challenging. 6 or more is better. Coordination, communication and good interpersonal team skills are crucial especially while in combat.
Know your build. Be organized, have multiple chests with build tools and mats to repair as soon as there are bombs and entry points. Don’t have TOO many entry points as it can get confusing. 1 wall depth into crafting room? No. Your crafting room, beds and storage should be hard to get to.
Consider bubbling and also keep the altar well protected. You can pull the priest off the altar and store it if the bubble has been crafted.
Anticlimb, while used to be a great deterrent has it’s caveats and now in many cases is useless other than for those who do not have the mats or know how for sorcery. Still use it for the casual thief of course. Consider double jumpers, that 1 wall and anticlimb can be surpassed easily, varied levels can be bypassed, what may seem like a good idea is sometimes not. Placing torches above doors and under anticlimb, or a placeable that gives purchase in height, for instance. Having an outer courtyard for ONLY defence is useless. It’s a waste of mats if you can’t respond quickly.
Thralls have never been good enough for complete defence, experienced raiders can avoid them or take them down easily. Now with the nerfs, even more so. AFAIAC thralls and pets are only useful for farming/dungeons or in tight spots where a raider doesn’t have much place to go and can be overwhelmed.
You can reach skybases with the bat. It’s actually really fun to raid them and there’s some tricks to finding them. Most often they’re close to water, sometimes you can detect them with changes in temperature, being entertained if they have a dancer and in one case recently for me, traversing through a high traffic area and seeing a bag fall from the sky.
I think mindset here is ultimately what is most important. Nothing is unraidable. You’re not safe from raiders. You need to learn more about the game. You need to accept that it won’t go your way to be easier and be willing to adapt. Or, and that is ok too, just not play PVP.